1902: The Ping Pong Craze!

I spent the morning cheering on marathoners as they crossed the finish line of the National Marathon in D.C. I was waiting with my friend Molly for our other friend Jocelyn to finish her run (apologies if I'm not using the right marathon lingo!). Anyway, she done good and I admire her for doing such a thing. I can barely run to the bathroom, let alone down the street! Let's just say I never really learned to run or do anything much athletic thanks to the twisted Florida educational system that allowed me to take marching band instead of physical education in junior high - I guess they thought the marching counting as physical enough activity? I regret it now, but at the time I was thrilled to not have to spend an hour in the gym each day, particularly since I was shy of changing in the locker room.

So, in the spirit of physical fitness today, and all of those fabulous runners, I bring you something from a relatively new digital resource provided by my employer, the Library of Congress, and the National Endowment for the Humanities. Browsing the newspapers in Chronicling America can be a lot of fun for someone like me, particularly if you use silly keyword searches (try searching for "hair care" (just look at this example), "etiquette boys" (led me to this great page of ads), "dancing girls" gave me this result, among others). And a search on terriers (near and dear to my heart), gave me these two pages: The Society Women and her Pet Dog.

Sorry - almost forgot about to the athletics! I particularly enjoyed this page, sent to me by a friend who works on the project: The Ping Pong Girl in Training. Now that's more my style of athleticism.

It's not pornography -- it's etiquette!

This article is great! And they are digitizing them! Can't wait.

Thanks for the tip, Jurretta!

1929: Beautiful Breasts

This being the first day of 2008 (hard to believe) I thought I would find something to help you with your latest new year's resolutions. I'm sure most of you have resolved to spend more time with family and friends, excercise more, eat better, to earn more money and perhaps travel to exotic locales this coming year. But I wonder, are there any women out there resolving to take better care of a part of our bodies that we often take for granted -- the breasts? The author of Lovely Ladies hopes that you will. After reading this, I think I'll try to do better by them this year.

~~
No woman can have truly womanly beauty without beautiful breasts. If illness or childbirth causes them to droop, don't allow this condition to continue for a single month. And allow no perverted current ideas to cause you to bind or strap them into a semblance of boyish flatness, and thus break down their muscles and delicate tissues.

First, the underdeveloped breasts. Simply massage them in a rotating movement five minutes night and morning, with lanolin or cocoa butter, all that they will absorb. Dust with talcum. Always mix a few drops of tincture of benzoin with lanolin or cocoa butter for whitening.

Next, breasts that sag because of illness. Watch this particularly after operations, after childbirth, and after nursing a child. They must have a massage with diluted alcohol, then a good brisk slapping with a folded towel wrung out in cold water, then the upward and rotating massage with the lanolin or cocoa butter, unless they are already very large. Never under any circumstances attempt to reduce your breasts with epsom salts or reducing creams or bandages, or rubbing contraptions which are beneficial to other parts of the body.

Continue these ministrations until your breasts are beautiful, and return to the measures if your breasts tend ever to lose that beauty.
~~

Important Disclaimer: This is originally from the 1920s, so this advice may therefore be a bit unsound. You might want to confer with your doctor before rubbing something like "tincture of benzoin" (whatever that is) or any other product that sounds funny and is probably not readily found in your local drugstore onto your chest. And hey -- don't blame Miss Abigial if your breasts burst into flame with the use of epsom salts or reducing creams. This is meant for entertainment purposes only!

1956: Are you in the know?

I've been meaning to share this with you for some time, and finally had a moment to spare to scan in some photos that I know you'll just love. A little pamphlet titled Are you in the know? was given to me by my sweetie a few months back. Here's how part of the introduction reads:

"Want to make a fast exit from the department of utter confusion -- about fashions, grooming, etiquette -- poise and boys? That's why this booklet was born. To help you over the hump -- to that super-smooth dream cloud reserved for schoolebrities in the know."

Kimberly-Clark Corporation, of Kleenex and Kotex fame, were the publishers of this handy gem. The booklet accompanied an ad campaign, which is described over at the Museum of Menstruation.

For your giggling pleasure, I've scanned a few favorite pages in... click on them for a larger image.



If you like this, you'll enjoy my friend Lynn Peril's essay from years ago called Growing Up and Liking It, also posted at the MUM site.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

1881: Love Letters

This week I received a lovely gift from a coworker, Gene, who was looking to lighten his bookshelves at home. Knowing I had my little obsession with advice books (he came to my Valentine's Day presentation at the Library of Congress), he so graciously gave me a book written in 1881 called National Encyclopedia of Business and Social Forms: The Laws of Etiquette &c. &c. by James D. McCabe.

Coincidentally, the book has a section on correspondence, which ties in nicely with the Post article I mentioned in my previous post.

For those of you thinking about texting a very brief note to the one you are wooing, let's take a look back at how things were done back in the 1880s, waaaay before all this technology hit. I was going to quote something from the "Love Letters" section, but this one from "Letters of Excuse" struck me as a bit more entertaining, and more appropriate for the length of a blog post. The subject for this sample letter is "To a lady, apologizing for a broken engagement."

~~
Richmond, Ind., May 10th, 1881.

My Dear Miss Lee:

Permit me to explain my failure to keep my appointment with you this evening. I was on my way to your house, with the assurance of a pleasant evening, when I unfortunately stepped upon some slippery substance, lost my footing and fell to the ground, spraining my ankle severely. I am now confined to the house in consequence of this accident.

I regret my disappointment as much as the accident, but hope that the future may afford us many pleasant meetings.

Sincerely your friend,
Albert Holliday
~~

Now, would you prefer this instead?

"sorry cant keep fun date W U this evening. but slipped and fell 2 the ground, hurt ankle. stuck @ home. sorry, try again 2MORO?"

Yeah, I didn't think so.

1941: The Blossoming of Love

I'm pretty much an idiot when it comes to dating (why do you think I have all of these books, anyway?), and one thing I'm still pretty awkward about is using the word boyfriend, particularly when introducing him to people. Every time I say it I giggle, for no good reason! It's horrible, I know! Maybe if I had had a boyfriend in high school I would have gotten over this earlier in life.

I tried to find some advice about this topic but didn't come up with anything directly. But this entry, from Lillian Eichler's 1941 edition of New Book of Etiquette, cuts me a little slack, don't you think? (ok, I know it's a stretch...)

~~
It is impossible for anyone to give rules and regulations for the conduct of lovers. Modern etiquette is too sensible to standardize their conduct, too sensible to attempt with rules to rob love of its joyous spontaneity, its quaint and beautiful discoveries, its impulsive tendernesses. To make rules and regulations for lovers would be like making paper patterns for flowers. It simply cannot be done.

Monsieur de la Rochefoucauld says of lovers that "All there talk is of themselves." Not only all their talk but all their thoughts are of themselves. Love is selfish, but it is a selfishness that the world generously forgives. Our one word of suggestion is that the lovers do not think so exclusively of themselves that they neglect those who, at this time, deserve a little thought and attention from them.
~~

Point taken, Ms. Eichler, point taken.

1929: Personal Hygiene

Wooweee is the D.C. area hot this weekend! Even with the mid-afternoon hours wasted away napping in the central air conditioning (not even the dogs want to go outside), it's been pretty unbearable. And in the short time I did spend outside, well, I'll be honest, I've been perspiring quite a bit. What's a girl to do?

Well, this girl of course turned to the books for a little advice on personal hygiene, specifically how to "neutralize body odors." This was found in volume one of Lovely Ladies.

~~
There are so-called deodorants on the market which neutralize body odors. If you have the idea that they are injurious to you, and that by suppressing excess perspiration in a certain place it will only appear somewhere else, then use one of the powder deoderants which neutralize all body odors without in any way suppressing elimination through the pores.

Deodorants, talcum powder, astringents, mouth washes, the proper treatment of the skin areas that are too active in their functions of eliminating waste will remove all possibilities of unpleasant odors. If the area under your arms, for instance, is overactive in its eliminating functions, you can gradually and harmlessly close the pores and make them smaller and consequently less active with the use of a mild astringent after bathing. You can completely neutralize foot odors and in time quite correct any such abnormal condition by bathing them night and morning in a saturated solution of boracic acid and then dusting the powdered boracic acid into them in the place of talcum powder. Of course, you will not have to do this for longer than a week or two at the most, because after the condition is corrected just using the powdered boracic acid instead of talcum will keep them in a healthy condition.
~~

Just as a warning, I wouldn't recommend trying these treatments without doing some further research (I guess boracic acid is still used these days, but seems a bit scary to me). But still, I thought that bit about closing your pores entertaining for a hot summer day.

1966: Country Life

I'm in Vermont for a few days of R&R and found a few books at a used bookshop in Brattleboro:

Lao Russell's Love; a scientific and living philosophy of love and sex;

A 1980 reprint of the 1768 The delights of wisdom concerning conjugial love: after which follow, the pleasures of insanity concerning scortatory love by Emanuel Swedenborg;

and

Sex after Forty, which could come in handy now that I'm of that age.

To give you a taste, and to follow up on the nature theme, and since I'm in Vermont enjoying it's beauty, here's an excerpt from Russell's book. It's from a little section called "Country Life."

~~
One who loves country life always feels sorry for those who have not discovered the exciting and beautiful world of Nature. No one can ever be lonely as he walks in the woods and discovers the pulsing, singing, courageous, growing trees, and the bright, glowing beauty of wild flowers--an endless array of them. Each month you discover another species. Did you know that there are actually about twenty-five kinds of chickweeds? Their little white flowers contain tiny capsules of small seeds that songbirds love.

Nature is far more exciting than odor-filled cities whose streets are filled with raucous noises, instead of the sound of the songs of birds, the rustle of leaves, falling twigs, and the "chatter" of wildlife both far and near. . . .

No life is as exciting as forest life, and yet man crowds into cities where there is tension created by man who all too often desires to build transitory wealth for his body, instead of permanent wealth for his Soul.
~~

Ah, with that, I'll head back out into the woods. I've been on the computer way too long!

1952: Are You Ready for a Hike?

Well, we're certainly in the thick of summer, as is apparent here in very steamy District of Columbia Metropolitan area. And I'm sure everyone trying to figure out what to do to keep cool yet get out of the house, to enjoy a bit of nature. As Evelyn Millis Duvall writes in Love and the Facts of Life (which can be taken to heart by courting fools as well as groups of singles and married folk, I'd say) "some of the most enjoyable dates are those spent at picnics, around barbeque fires, swimming, skating, singing, playing folk games, and other such informal outings."

But such fun, informal outings aren't without danger, as William A. Evans warns us in Everyday Safety. He's a bit less cavalier than Ms. Duvall, and in addition to safety tips about swimming, boating, and building a fire, he provides these helpful hints on hiking through the woods.

~~
Hiking through the fields and woods is great fun. To enjoy a good hike it is important that you be properly dressed for the occasion. Good heavy-soled shoes are the first thing needed if you plan to walk very far. Girls should wear low-heeled shoes; to have a good time one must be comfortable, and there is less danger of turning one's ankle if low-heeled shoes are worn. Full-length trousers, slacks, or heavy stockings should be worn in order to protect the legs. The other clothing should be comfortably loose and not too heavy because the exercise keeps one warm. It is a good plan to wear a jacket or shirt with full-length sleeves in order to protect the arms.

One of the things which most frequently spoils the fun of being out in the woods or fields is infection from poison ivy, poison oak, sumac, or other kinds of weeds. Some persons seem to be immune from such poisoning while others are poisoned even by wild daisies, ragweeds, or smart weeds. There is also the danger of infection from scratches caused by briars, thorns, burrs, and splinters.
~~

If that quote didn't depress you enough, you might be interested in another from this book, on Carelessness. And if you're thinking ahead to winter, here's another from killjoy Evans.

On that note, I hope you are having a fun summer. But not too much fun! Be careful out there!

1932: Good Manners in Public Places

I ride the Red Line on Washington's Metrorail system every day to work. Usually it's not so bad, but lately I seem to be seated right near folks who are just plain breaking the rules: drinking drinks, eating sandwiches, all that---not to mention the typical rude behaviors like cell phone gabbing, loud, tinny, earbuds. But the absolute worst, I tell you, was the other morning when a man nearby started clipping his fingernails right there on the train. ARGH. Man, I'm cranky! I guess I need a vacation.

Since my extended days off aren't scheduled for a month or so from now, I must take a bit of comfort in sharing some "Good Manners in Public Places" from Good Manners for Young Americans.. This section begins with "A courteous person will not make himself conspicuous or troublesome in any place," and does bring up a relevant piece of advice for my recent car-mate: "Care for your finger nails, your face, your hair in your room at home, not in any public place. After making your toilet as well as you can, forget it."

Here are some other tips for manners while on public transport:

~~
There is no other place in which the spirit of courtesy seems so lacking as in our trolley cars, elevated trains and subways.

In getting a car, stand aside, and let those who are infirm or older precede you.

Always rise to give your seat to a much older person, to a cripple or to a mother with a child.

Never chew gum in cars [uh, oh, I do this one] or in other public places. If you must chew gum, let it be within the privacy of your own room.

If you do not wish to be thought ill-bred, do not eat in street cars.

When on a train do not occupy more seat room than is yours by right.
~~

That reminds me about the seat hoggers. Lift up your bags and let others sit down, would you, please?

1934: Life Begins at Forty

Well, here I am, on the eve of my 40th birthday, contemplating things such as oh, the last 39.999 years of my life. I can't believe my thirties are over. Seems like only yesterday that I was starting out young and fresh at the Library of Congress, 10 years ago last month. Time flies!

To help celebrate my 40th, I of course had to turn to my books. I've been saving this book for this day. It's called Life Begins at 40, written by Walter B. Pitkin. The only downside is that the subject headers in the catalog for this include "middle age" (I don't know if I'm ready to think of myself in those terms) -- but then again the subjects also include "success" -- so I guess I shouldn't nitpick too much. In any case, here's a taste of Pitkin's view of 40.

~~
High excitements lie ahead of you now turning forty. The race has nibbled the fruits of wisdom and found them both sweet and sustaining. Thus far it has turned to account almost nothing of its inventions and discoveries. The world is still to be civilized; and, in your day, this supreme process will begin. Were you to be no more than idle spectators, all other ages, past and future, would envy you. But you will be more than that; you will eat the meat of giants and overtop all of your ancestors. You will soon look through a 200-inch telescope and scan the back yards of the moon as if they were at the bottom of a little hill. You will remodel your frames and your temperaments with cunningly concocted foods and pills. You will have little cause to worry over the price of clothes and rent. Or, if you do not live to see such wonders, you will at least behold them drawing near -- which, of itself, will be a wonder. . . . Yes, you are the luckiest of all. Life begins at forty -- now more richly than ever before, and perhaps as richly as ever again.
~~

Gosh, forty sounds a bit kooky based on this description. Wish me luck!

1953: On Catching a Wealthy Sponsor

I know I said a few months back that Miss Abigail was livin' the single life, but things have changed due to a night with the gals drinking a few margaritas and crafting and posting our profiles on an online dating site. Well, lo and behold, I snatched me a man a month later! So far things are great - Denis doesn't mind my crazy dogs or my book obsession (heck, he once owned a copy of Live Alone and Like It). Kindrid spirits, I tell you. I thought it would be fitting for his "coming out on the Abiblog" to talk about an upcoming gig of the band he's in -- Boister does original scores for Buster Keaton films, among other things. Their next performance, set for this Sunday at 2pm at the AFI Silver in Silver Spring, Maryland, is actually quite relevant for readers of this blog. Filmed in 1925, Seven Chances is all about a man who, if he can find a bride and marry her in time, will inherit millions. I haven't seen it yet, but apparently there's a great chase scene, with tons of young, hopeful brides running down the streets of L.A. hoping to catch him.

In keeping with the storyline of the movie, the new squeeze and I did a little research and came up with this quote, from a chapter in The Unfair Sex called "On Catching a Weathly Sponsor." I bet this would have come in handy for the brides in this movie. Too bad it was written in 1953!

~~
It is far more difficult to acquire a Sponsor than to catch a husband. To begin with, only three per cent of the male population is wealthy enough to qualify. Just think how many women are trying for each member of that select group. After you eliminate the unattractive women, the inexperienced, and the inadequate, the competition is still too much for any but the most gifted.

Even girls who are both talented and diligent frequently fail. For Luck plays an important role. So much depends on getting the breaks, on having the right contacts, on the accident of proper timing.

True, on rare occasions a novice who has none of the qualifications for success (and often no ambition) will by some quirk of chance be precipitated into a brilliant alliance with a rich man. Reports of this kind of accidental success give many naive girls a false perspective on the Weathly Sponsor situation, and they promptly fling themselves into the contest with great expectations and childish fancies. I sincerely hope you willl not be one of those who rush in where angels fear to tread.
~~

1919: Cheerfulness

Since today is mother's day, I thought I'd bring you a little something from the parenting side of advice books. The following is from one called The Mother's Book. My own mom has raised me with a cheerful outlook on life, I think, so this one seemed fitting as a way to honor her and all she's done for me.

~~
Cheerfulness has been delightfully called "the bright weather of the heart." Let the mother smile down upon the babe that gazes tearfully up into her eyes, and often out of a peevish humor a happy spirit is at once evoked, for an infant is most sensitive to look and tone. Let her meet its childish woes and hurts with an encouraging word, and very early it will begin to take a cheerful view of life; and how easily it attaches itself to anyone with a bright face and a merry heart! We are generous in the education of our children, but do we not sometimes neglect the very important art of cheerfulness? Draw the child's attention to the beauty of a rainy day, and to the different blessings associated with merry spring, glowing summer, gorgeous autumn, and brisk winter. Teach them to look more often up into the sky with its wonderful cloud effects; for the cheerful ones are always those who look out and up. It is easier now than in the olden days to teach the young lessons of cheer; for more and more their social betterment is made a subject of study. It was not until late in the nineteenth century, for example, that children were taught to sing, and does not the music thus brought into their lives impart genuine pleasure?

Some mothers who read these words will sigh and say that withal life is a chapter of many and varied experiences, and that it is hard always to be bright. Well, there are clouds it is true, but there is a rift somewhere; the best way is to walk hand in hand with the children right up to manhood and womanhood, trying to carry the cheer together, and cheerfulness has an abiding element that overcomes many obstacles.
~~

On that note, Happy Mother's Day all you mothers out there, particularly my own!

1964: Boys Are Different!

A special thank you to Sherri Baer, who just sent me two fabulous little pink books by Ruth Vaughn: It's Fun to Be a Girl ("in which she tells how 'sugar and spice and everything nice' can be made a dream come true," so says the cover) and the follow-up Dreams Can Come True ("because of her unquestioned faith in this fact, she reminds her readers that it is fun to be a girl").

This little excerpt, titled "Boys are Different!" is from Dreams Can Come True. I find this fascinating. Who knew that girls and boys could be so different, yet still get along! This explains a lot.

~~
You will just have to admit that it's true. Their whole thought processes are different. Their whole outlook upon life is different! Their interests, dreams, and ambitions are different.

Girls like security and warmth. Boys are freespirited. Girls want to leave quickly any scene of unhappiness. Boys can implulsively knock another boy across the room. Girls want praise, attention. Boys are happy just to have you in the same room with them while they devote all of their attention elsewhere. (It certainly isn't much fun for you when Steve comes to see you and spends all evening discussing baseball talk with your father. But Steve is happy just because you are near!)

Girls love poetic, beautiful, dreaming things: orchids, very soft blue satin the color of the morning sky, "Rhapsody in Blue," soft candleglow, bubble bath. Boys love plain, common, everyday things: baseball, the sports page, digging in the garden, greasy motors, carpenters' saws. Girls always prefer a date with Steve to congealing at a girls' party. Boys often prefer to just "be with the boys."
~~

1961: Eyeglasses

I did a stupid thing this weekend--I lost my glasses! I had my sunglasses on at the time, and my regular frames somehow fell out of my pocket while I was out walking the dogs. I retraced my steps and looked high and low for them but they are gone gone gone. So since Saturday I've been wearing an old pair that has an outdated prescription which hurts my head, and my regular prescription sunglasses whenever I can get away with that without looking too ridiculous.

I ordered a cool new pair yesterday that should arrive shortly, but in the meantime I thought I would see what the advice gods had to say about wearing glasses. The following is from Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, written in 1960 by Gayelord Hauser. The section on eyeglasses starts out by talking about doing eye drills and eye relaxation, enough to strengthen your eyes so you don't need glasses. But then Hauser brushes aside that quackery and writes:

~~
I definitely do not belong to the school that says: "Throw away your glasses." Unless you are willing to work on your eyes constantly and daily, I suggest that you consult the best eye doctor in your city and let him decide, after a thorough examination, whether or not you need glasses. There are few things so damaging to a woman's looks as her straining, squinting effort to see. It is not only detrimental to the eyes, for tissues around the eyes become a mass of fine, squinting lines. Along with the muscles of the eyes, your whole face and even the muscles of your neck and shoulders become tense in the struggle to see.
~~

Exactly how I'm feeling! Let's continue:

~~
The decision rests entirely with you and your eye doctor. If you need glasses, wear them boldly and confidently. Today women treat eyeglasses not as a handicap to good looks but as an accessory. You no longer need to change frames and shapes that will make the glasses inconspicuous. Quite the contrary--the bolder the better.
~~

My new ones are slightly diamond shaped. I hope that's bold enough.

1967: Personal Products

Apologies for not posting lately, been a bit busy at work and with the social life. One of my recent activities has been planning my trip to Paris -- I'm going for work but hopefully will have a little time to see the city. Already stressing about what to pack (I tend to overpack normally, but got a smaller suitcase this weekend so need to be good this time), I turned to a new book in my collection for help. There are plenty of packing tips in Frances Koltun's Complete Book for the Intelligent Woman Traveler, published in 1967, but I thought this advice about "personal products" was more fun to share with you. After reading these, I bet you ladies will be glad times have changed just a bit since the 60s. I am, particularly when thinking about those sanitary towels.

~~
Even women who are normally level-headed about snakes, how much to tip a mahout or what to do for impetigo, find themselves at a loss about how much to pack in the way of personal products, the beauty industry's euphemism for sanitary napkins, et al. I still remember a traveling companion on a trip to Europe who filled one of her two suitcases with boxes of Kotex because she was sure she'd never find any abroad.

Her apprehension belonged to the era of steamer trunks, motoring veils, and 10-day ocean crossings. Today, American products such as Kotex and Tampax are found in nearly every major country of the world. You have only to walk into a large, centrally located drugstore to find them. . . .

There are some local variations you may want to know about: In England, sanitary napkins are called sanitary towels, and have loops at either end. As these are exported to several countries in the world, you may run into them from time to time. In French, they're called garnitures périodiques; in Spanish, they're toallas sanitarias or higiénicas; in German, damenbinden; in Italian, assorbenti igienici; in Swedish, sanitets bindan; in Japanese seiritai. With these languages at your command, you can manage anywhere should an "English-speaking" pharmacy be unavailable, or should the chambermaid in your hotel not speak English. (If a sudden need arises, she's the one to ring for.) . . .

If you'd like to start out armed with some sort of protection, Kotex puts out a box of individually wrapped napkins -- eight for 39 cents -- that's fine for traveling. Or break up a larger box, wrap each napkin in Kleenex and stuff it into corners of your suitcase or among the layers of your underwear. Don't be embarrassed or have nightmares about going through customs (which does happen to young women going abroad for the first time) with Kotex or Tampax in your luggage. You can be sure that the officials are thoroughly familiar with these products and won't even give them a passing glance.

1913: Ventilation

It's been in the 70s this week in Washington, D.C., which has been lovely (though snow is predicted for Saturday). This has allowed me to turn off the heat and open the windows for the first time in months. I love sleeping with the window open, even if only for these flukey few days. All this good weather got me thinking about fresh air. The following is from a 1913 texbook called General Hygiene.

~~
Need of Ventilation -- Exchanging the impure air of a room for air which is pure and fresh is called ventilation. A small room will require complete change of air within an hour if only one person is in it. A large room will require a complete change of air within a few minutes if many persons are in it. A schoolroom, church, or other meeting place needs to be ventilated all the time that it is in use, for the air will become unwholesome within a few moments, unless a stream of fresh air is constantly flowing into it.

How to Ventilate -- Some air will pass in and out of a room through cracks in its doors, windows, floor, and walls. Well-built houses have few cracks, and only a little fresh air will enter them, unless openings are made to the outdoor air. One way of ventilating a room is to open a window. This is often the only way to get fresh air into a room. It is easy to ventilate a room that is heated. Warm air is lighter than cold air, and will rise to the ceiling, like a cork on water. When the upper sash of a window is lowered, a stream of foul air passes out above it. Fresh air enters the room between the two sashes, and through cracks in the other parts of the room. If foul air passes out of the room, we may be sure that other air enters the room. When the lower sash of a window is raised, foul air sometimes passes out through the opening, and sometimes fresh air blows into the room through the opening, but whether the foul air blows out, or fresh air blows in, the air of the room becomes changed.
~~

Wow, I never knew that opening a window was so complex. Wait -- there's more!

~~
Ventilating Bedrooms -- Some persons think that a bedroom does not need to be ventilated during the night if it is aired well during the daytime. A person sleeping in a small, closed bedroom will cause the room of fresh air to become foul within an hour after he goes to bed. He will then breathe foul air through all the rest of the night, unless he ventilates the room. Many suppose that a person will not be harmed by breathing air which he himself has made foul. Impure air is as poisonous to the person who makes it foul as it is to another person who may breathe it.
~~

Ewww.

I probably shouldn't have posted this right before heading to bed!

1949: Nine to Five Shift

Life at work has been a bit hectic this week. How does a last-minute office move while there are seemingly a zillion things to do sound? Yeah, exactly.

Still trying to think happy thoughts, I turned to the books to see if I could find any tips that would help us all get through the mess of a big move. I actually found a pamphlet while packing up my desk that could be handy: "How to Deal with Stress." But I also checked the books at home, and found this tidbit from The Betty Betz Career Book: The Teen-Age Guide to a Successful Future. In it, Betz offers all sorts of advice for getting and keeping a job, include this one for when things get a little troublesome:

~~
Even in the smoothest-run office things sometimes get bungled up, but try not to let your temperature rise to a boiling point. No matter how unfair a situation seems, hysterics, tears and temper won't set it straight. Worse yet, running to your fellow workers to blab your problem will just cause trouble. Keep calm, button up your troubles and everything will work out sooner or later. When it does, you'll be glad that you didn't blow your top, for that never gets you any place. Chances are that a day after the big pow-row you'll forget the whole thing and be busy working on some other project.
~~

OK, everyone--back to work!

1923: Toasts (for a Christening)

During some recent interviews, reporters asked if I ever take my own advice. I use most of my books for reference for the Web site and all things related, but there are occasions when they come in handy for personal advice (if friends or other sources can't help out). Such as today, when I was stumped as to whether to get my nephew a christening present, and what. I poked around in the books and found that a book or item of clothing would be ok (I'm not the most religious person so feel odd getting him something with a cross on it).

With that settled, I read a bit more about christening etiquette, and thought you would enjoy the following from the Book of Good Manners. Who knew that toast were appropriate for this occasion?

~~
Toasts---usually offered by one of the godfathers when a momentary lull in the table-talk affords an opportunity---may be proposed in the following terms:

"Let us unite in wishing Master Henry Morton long life, health and happiness!"

or:

"Miss Helen May White---to her health, wealth and happiness!"

Rising and touching glasses the guests may respond:

"Long life and prosperity! Good luck to him! (or her!)"
~~

So, with that in mind:

Let us unite in wishing my nephew Master Manual Antonio Perez III long life, health, happiness, and wealth!

Classic Valentine's Day Advice

Advice for Valentine's Day - you know you want it! I've covered this quite a bit in previous years, so here are a few links tidbits that you might find useful today.

Confused about this whole "in love" thing? Check out this excerpt from Elinor Glyn's 1925 This Passion Called Love.

Trying to pick the right flowers to give your sweetie? See The Language of Flowers from 1907.

Wondering how to express your love in writing? Skip the email and get out that pen. Some sample love letters here.

Plenty more love advice where that came from.

And finally,

Single and happy? You'll love this one, from a book titled Live Alone and Like It.

XOXO
Miss Abigail

1869: Draw Up An Advertisement

Oh my. Here we are in 2007, thinking we're all so clever using the internet and newspaper classified ads to find dates and mates, but we're not. I stumble across a quote from 1869 (yes, 1869!) suggesting that men having trouble finding a wife might want to take out an ad in newspapers. Widely circulated newspapers. Lots of them.

The book? The Science of a New Life, by John Cowan. Here's an excerpt:

~~
Do not regard it as absurd and wrong if I advise you to do precisely as a farmer would, who, desiring to purchase a farm, and having examined all within his country that are for sale, and finding none that will suit him--he advertises....The world, in its progressive, onward march, with its thorough intermixture of race and quality, offers a broader and wider field for the selection of a rightly constituted mate, than does the narrow field of a village or city ward, and the people of this wide-world area can in no better way be reached than through the advertising columns of the newspaper.

You draw up an advertisement, stating in as few words as possible your idiosyncrasies, and inviting replies from only those who imagine they approach your standard character. You insert it in one or more papers of large circulation, and it is read by thousands of marriageable women, and among them, it is possible, the one who would make you an unapproachable mate, and who, of course, could not possibly have ever heard of you other than in this way. A correspondence is commenced with a score of more of those having an appearance of suiting; a phrenological analysis of the character of each is requested by you [there's an earlier section of the book that suggests this as an important step in the courtship process; I will spare you the details], and which, being received, is compared and returned; presently the right one is discovered, and an engagement follows.
~~

Miss Abigail again: The author goes on to discuss the pros and cons of this sort of thing. Pros include "it allows an immensely wide field for a right selection" and something about the "Law of Choice... in writing unfolding each other's characteristic traits; or, what is more preferable, more desirable..." and again he repeats the benefits of that phrenological chart. Cons: "Characters of impure formation ... probably have adopted this way of securing a victim to their lustful natures." Hmm... he seems to blame women for that one. Let's skip ahead. He sums up his theory about the benefits of advertising yourself in the paper this way:

~~
It needs no argument to show that there is something radically wrong in the present mode of mate-choosing. The every-day records of family quarrels, scandals, separations and divorces, too sadly prove the fact that the present method of forming matrimonial alliances must in some measure be changed, if a happy and enjoyable married existance is desired.

1956: Why Do I Love You?

In preparation for my Valentine's Day talk at the Library of Congress (see the press release for more information), I've started to research exerpts of advice about love. I've posted quite a bit over the years on the topic, but hope to find some fresh material for the talk.

To whet your appetite (it is a talk focusing on love and food, after all), here's a little something from Evelyn Millis Duvall's Facts of Life and Love for Teen-Agers from 1956:

~~
Lovers frequently wonder why they love each other. The strange power of love baffles them. They ask each other, "Why do I love you?" This is a good question and it can be answered, at least in part. There are real reasons that one person loves another. As these reasons are understood, the love quite often grows stronger still. Only if the attraction is not love at all but merely a passing fancy, will it weaken as it is understood.

We love each other oftentimes because we meet each other's needs. Janice is effervescent and flighty. She loves Dan partly because he is always so calm and stable. He loves her partly because she is so peppy and full of life. They are good for each other, in that each meets some real need in the other.

As we satisfy each other's need for response and belongingness, we give our love a chance to grow stronger still. W all need to feel that we are wanted, that we are desirable, and that other people like to have us around. When two persons give each other this sense of being someone special, then each strengthens the love feeling in the other.
~~

Aww, how sweet!

1924: The New Year's Resolution

I hope you had a happy holiday. I've survived Christmas week, with a whirlwind trip to Buffalo, Baltimore, Mineral and then Gainesville, Virginia, to visit family... though it was good to see everyone I'm happy to be back home after all that roadtripping.

I thought I would bring in the New Year with a quote from advice maven Lillian Eichler. She wrote The Customs of Mankind in 1924. It was in this book that I found a little something about the tradition many of us repeat each year, that of the New Year's resolution.

~~

The New Year's resolution undoubtedly had its origin in the notion that the coming year represented an entirely new period of life to the individual, with which he might do as he pleased. What was already passed he put out of his mind, for it was something over which he had no control. But on the coming year he concentrated in earnestness. It spread out like a golden vista before him. It was a period of promise. And he probably found himself making solemn avowals concerning what he would do with his next year of life.

In ancient England it was the custom to clean out the chimneys on New Year's Day so that luck could descend and, of course, remain all year. With us it is customary to speak of "cleaning the slate" (of life) and making good resolutions so that the "slate" will remain clean throughout the year.

The making of New Year's resolutions became quickly a common practice. We can understand why a custom such as this would appeal to the popular fancy and remain throughout the generations. To a mass mind, no period of the year could be more timely for a change in one's mode of living than that period which represents the beginning of the year. A new year--a new life.

~~

Happy 2007!

1924: Road Courtesy

I must be having a mid-life crisis. I became obsessed with a car (yes, a car) and just had to have it. So, traded in my trusty 2001 VW Golf (a moment of silence please) and negotiated a pretty good deal on a silver Madza3 hatchback. So now that I'm out on the road with it, traversing the streets of suburban and urban D.C., I ask my fellow driver to mind your manners while on the road. The following excerpt is from the 1924 booklet Etiquette in Public, written by early twentieth-century etiquette goddess Lillian Eichler.

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If courtesy on the road were made traditional, if good nature and good-will were expected of every motorist, is it assuming too much to imagine a time when rudeness on the road will be as rare as it now is in social contact? Certainly when motorists expect courtesy of one another, as guests do in a drawing room, it will be forthcoming.

And after all, by its very nature, conduct on the highway is immeasurably more important than the surface conventions of the drawing room; for here we find that not only are courtesy and kindliness of spirit involved, but life itself. If a man is interested in conversation, witty, agreeable -- we can find it in our hearts to forget that he never rises when a lady enters a room. But if a motorist misses our heel by a fraction of an inch, we cannot forgive him, no matter how agreeable a chap he may be otherwise.
~~

So do you think Ms. Eichler would be pleased with our tailgating, speed-loving, cell-phone talking society today? She probably would have expected more by now, with so many years of driving under our belts since she wrote this.