Who is Miss Abigail?

Abigail Grotke
Silver Spring, MD
email: missabigail at missabigail dot com
twitter: @DearMissAbigail

Find me on…

Get the feed


Miss Abigail has a collection of over 1,000 classic advice books, spanning from 1822 to 1978 and covering a variety of topics, from love and romance to etiquette and charm. The collection sparked the idea for this site, then a book, Miss Abigail's Guide to Dating, Mating, and Marriage, which has inspired an Off-Broadway production of the same name!


Posts Tagged ‘moral support’

Go Hubby! Get a Job! Go Hubby! Ra Ra Ra!

Sunday, August 8th, 2010

nothing can shake her faith in himQ Dear Miss Abigail:

My husband lost his job. Any suggestions for how to be supportive and not be a nag. i.e. “so, what did you do today, dear?” Obviously not a good thing to say.


A Dear Debbie:

Yeah, I guess that would be a little awkward, particularly when the job market is so bleak. I’d say take Mrs. Dale Carnegie’s advice in How to Help Your Husband Get Ahead, and stay focused on keeping his morale high, because, as Mrs. Carnegie writes:

“Every man needs a believer, a woman who is for him when circumstances are against him. When nothing goes right, when he is under fire, when he fails, a man needs a wife who will build up his resistance and confidence by letting him know that nothing can shake her faith in him. If his wife doesn’t believe in him, who will?”

1953: Fundamental Techniques of Morale Building

Rule 1: Learn to listen effectively by:

a: Expressing alertness and attention through facial expression and bodily poise.

b: Asking intelligent questions.

c: Never betraying a confidence.

Rule 2: Help your husband be the man he would like to be by giving him praise and encouragement.

Rule 3: When things go wrong ~ be a believer!

Source: Carnegie, Mrs. Dale (Dorothy). How to Help Your Husband Get Ahead in His Social and Business Life. New York: Greystone Press, 1953.
~ pp. 54, 57 ~