Who is Miss Abigail?

Abigail Grotke
Silver Spring, MD
email: missabigail at missabigail dot com
twitter: @DearMissAbigail

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Miss Abigail has a collection of over 1,000 classic advice books, spanning from 1822 to 1978 and covering a variety of topics, from love and romance to etiquette and charm. The collection sparked the idea for this site, then a book, Miss Abigail's Guide to Dating, Mating, and Marriage, which has inspired an Off-Broadway production of the same name!


Posts Tagged ‘color’

Sock Tips for Men

Sunday, August 15th, 2010

never underestimate the importance of your socksQ Dear Miss Abigail:

Why is white socks with black pants a no-no? I mean, if you are wearing some really expensive good-looking (dark) shoes, then wouldn’t it be a good idea to put on white socks to draw attention to those shoes? And what is the dress-code for black pants? It doesn’t seem to be a problem wearing white shirt with black pants. Isn’t that illogical?

BTW: Why isn’t there a simple page on http://www.kreative.net/timewarp/ (your old site), which points to your new site? My face almost turned white, as I thought you might have passed away, or something horrible had happened, when I didn’t find your page. Glad you’re still here.

Morten, the color-confused

A Dear Morten:

First things first: I did have a pointer page at the old address for about nine months after getting my own URL, but I had to take it down when I switched ISPs and could not pay for the kreative.net site in addition to my new account. Apologies for your moment of horror, but so glad you found me again.

Now onto the show. I located this excerpt about socks in Alice Bell and Pert Wall’s The Magic Power of Grooming in a Man’s World, picked up on a recent trip to the Croatan Book Store in Kill Devil Hills, N.C.

1965: Socks

One of the most important factors in good grooming is good taste in selecting and wearing socks. Unimportant as it may seem, socks play an important role, not only as an addition to your wardrobe, but as a fundamental basis for proper attire. For example, any time you are wearing a tie, you should wear dressy socks that will extend over the calf, and stay there. It is inexcusable to tug constantly at either your socks or your tie. When sitting, no part of your bare leg should be visible. Strangely enough, the type of socks you wear may reveal your personality. . . .

Here are the answers to the questions that usually arise:

1. Are socks and ties supposed to match?
Ans. They may, but it is not necessary. Your socks may match your suit, your shoes, or your tie, if your tie is dark.

2. What types of socks does a man wear who is troubled with his feet?
Ans. Undyed socks, but dark socks over those.

3. Are white socks correct for street or business wear?
Ans. No! One never wears white socks with dark suits. However, in resort or suburban areas where white suits and shoes are worn, it is then permissible to wear white socks.

4. Are white socks worn by teen-agers?
Ans. Yes. In Junior High School boys generally wear white socks, but after that, they would not think of it.

5. What determines the size of the sock?
Ans. If the socks are even sized, they are usually marked from 10 to 13, although many manufacturers size their socks to 14 and 14 1/2. The sock is generally 1 1/2 sizes larger than the shoe size. For example, should you wear a size 10 shoe, you would wear a sock sized 11 1/2.

6. What determines the size of the stretch sock?
Ans. This sock will fit any foot unless the man is unusually tall or stout, in which case it would be advisable to buy the king size, which will take up the added volume. Actually, size is not a very important factor, since approximately 80% of all men’s socks sold today are the stretch type.

7. How important are Argyles or fancy socks?
Ans. These are out of fashion today, although bright socks may be used for sporting activities, or for relaxing around the house.

8. What type of sock is used for formal or evening wear?
Ans. Black, over-the-calf stretch nylons, cottons, or wools, depending upon the time of year.

9. What about support hose?
Ans. Day by day this type of hose is gaining in popularity with the man who is on his feet most of the time. He finds that they give him added support, and his feet do not tire so easily.

10. How should socks by laundered?
Ans. In washing machines or by hand.

11. Why do socks fade?
Ans. Improper drying, harsh detergents, bleach or exposure to the sun may cause fading. Socks should never be hung in the sun to dry since the sun acts as a bleaching agent.

12. What is the most popular in the ribbed socks?
Ans. The rib may vary in width from narrow to wide, but the most popular in the dress style is the 6 x 3 medium.

13. What types of socks are used for beach, tennis, boating, or with walking shorts?
Ans. The crew, or casual, above-the-knee socks. They may even match the shorts you are wearing.

Never underestimate the importance of your socks in relationship to your good grooming. Socks are often one of the most neglected, yet essential elements of correct dress. Improper coordination can so easily spoil a handsome picture. Allow your wardrobe to include a varied selection of hose that will inevitably help all of your socks last longer.

Source: Bell, Alice and Pert Wall. The Magic Power of Grooming in a Man’s World. Charleston, S.C.: Walker, Evans & Cogswell, 1965.
~ pp. 203, 205-7 ~

Color Me Offended

Sunday, August 15th, 2010

an indication of your personalityQ Dear Miss Abigail:

What the hell kind of logic is this “understanding and dating boys” [four-letter expletive beginning with sh and ending with t, deleted by the hostess so the children can keep reading]? Not everyone that is female enjoys the color pink. In fact, some prefer black. Assuming that girls like dresses and avoid tomboyishness is to show a sexist perception of the female gender. Thus placing girls and boys in stereotypical roles. What kind of help is a website designed to assist females in understanding males when the site generalizes a female view, eliminating the diversity of female emotions restricting any chance of helping females with male problems? Some females seek a relationship based upon mental and emotional interdependence. Why don’t you try to address issues that don’t involve “what to wear or say to make him love you” or “how to win him over” as considering true love would not need to alter in order to receive love. Thank you for making the female race sound like a gang of hopeless romantics, solely driven by a boy’s possibility for affection, and concerned with nothing more than thoughts of “how can I change myself to make him like me” or “what would HE like” opposed to what I would like. Not ALL of us are preoccupied with forgetting ourselves just to make a male happy, and we all don’t suffer from deluding ourselves from succeeding in obtaining unattainable goals at the end of our tunnel.

Two broad-minded individual strong-headed college gals

A Dear Gals:

Well, if you hate my site that much, you don’t have to visit it. It’s a big Internet out there ~ I wouldn’t be offended, really. But in my defense, I think you might want to read my About page to see what I’m actually doing here. And see another question, in which I tell the young lady to stay true to herself. Doesn’t that count?

Now onto the offensive, pointless advice geared toward leading young ladies astray. Here’s a little something from the 1929 book Lovely Ladies regarding one’s knowledge of one’s color. After reading a bit more of the chapter (too long to include here), I realized that yes ~ I am truly a PINK girl!

1929: Colors and You

Don’t you think that it is logical, since your life revolves around you, to begin with yourself? You see, you also have color in yourself ~ in your eyes, hair, and skin. These colors you are constantly presenting to the world, and you cannot possibly avoid doing so. Nor should you. You have heard of and seen people to whom the adjective ‘colorless’ has been applied. They are in fact and in personality colorless. If they knew about color what you are going to know, they would not only be colorful (and, what is more, correctly colorful) to others, but to themselves as well. And since there are actual physical and chemical reasons for your coloring, your particular coloring is indeed an indication of your personality.

Source: Dare, Frances. Lovely Ladies: The Art of Being a Woman, Vol. I. Garden City, N.Y.: Doubleday, Doran & Company, 1929.
~ pp. 124-25 ~