I apologize for the lag time since my last selection. The delay was due to a much-needed trip out to the woods, where I was nowhere near a computer. I hope you are not angry with me! I just want to be liked! Don’t you? Yes, I thought so. So let’s read a bit from Everyday Living for Girls: A Textbook in Personal Regimen in order to help us achieve this goal, shall we?
1936: Everyone Wants To Be Liked
Definitions of personality and character would often lead us to suppose they are one and the same. Perhaps the difference between character and personality can be most simply stated as follows: Character is one’s true moral worth, and personality its outward expression as seen by others. It is, then, quite possible to be of an upright and moral character and yet have an unpleasant personality, and vice versa. . . . Have you ever thought that we may admire our friends because they are good-looking and respect them because they are clever, but that we love them because they are pleasant and easy to get along with? Probably no one thing contributes more to popularity than being good natured. Have you tried it?
Traits others like in us. What, then, are some of the things that we should do or refrain from doing in order to be liked? In the first place, no one likes affectation on the part of others. “Be yourself,” has become a slang expression, but it is still good advice. The girl who tries to act and look more sophisticated or accomplished than she is, is making a great mistake.
People do not like interference. Do not be inquisitive about other people’s affairs, and certainly never take part in other people’s quarrels.
Do not argue. Hardly anyone can keep from getting angry or offensive when arguing, and as was said in the beginning, good nature is a great asset.
Be a good listener. Do not carry on a monologue, but give others a chance to talk. Never make fun of others. If you do, your listeners will never trust you not to make fun of them when their backs are turned.
Do not be moody. To say of one that she is always the same is a great compliment.
Sociability and friendliness are very useful and endearing traits. Friends are indispensable, and acquaintances are always possible friends.
It is a fine thing to have a sense of humor. Indeed, it is almost always listed as a necessary element in popularity. Cultivate it, if possible.
Learn what good taste is and practive it in dress, manners, and all social relations.
No one is better liked as a companion than one who is self-possessed, well poised, and who knows how to behave correctly under all circumstances.
Be interesting. Learn to talk about things rather than about people.
Do not be too sensitive. Think about other people, not about yourself and what kind of an impression you are making, and do not take offense quickly.
Do not be too critical of what others do or say, of entertainments, or conditions. There is no surer way of making others shun your companionship and of spoiling your own good times.
Always make acknowledgment of everything done for you, no matter how slight it may be. Do not look upon an act of courtesy or a favor as your just due.
These are only a few of the ways in which one may gain deserved popularity. See how many others you can add to the list.
Source: Van Duzer, Adelaide Laura, et. al. Everyday Living for Girls. Chicago: J. B. Lippincott Company,1936.
~ pp. 356-57 ~