Fifty-Six + Nineteen = Trouble

an attempt at rejuvenationQ Dear Miss Abigail:

Well, here is one for you. I am a fifty-six-year-young man in good shape. I lift weights and run to mention a few things, and do them because they are fun for me, not for vain reasons. Yesterday at our library a nineteen-year-old girl gave me a look that just said “O.K., come and ask me!” Well I did, and we went for coffee and shared phone numbers and email addresses. Of course I am tempted ~ I’m only human and still very ready. What is your advice, Miss Abigail?

Mr. Johnny

A Dear Mr. Johnny:

You don’t say whether you are married or not, so it’s kinda hard for me to answer properly. But I did stumble across this gem from The Sexual Conduct of Men and Women, by Norman Lockridge. It was written way back in 1956, when I think folks in their fifties were “elderly.” I bet you are particularly glad times have changed.

1956: The Comforts of an Old Man

Elderly men who consort with young women expect nothing for which they do not pay, and are wiser than many therefore. At the price ~ and it is just as high as most people think it is ~ all they expect is not to be laughed at until their backs are turned, and that is about all they get. Considering the demands society makes on the individual male to show himself to be virile while he is young, it is rather unfair to heap ridicule upon the head of the male who still strives for the same reputation when he is becoming old. The ageing buck is a stock character of comedy, with his somewhat passe clothes, his Homburg and spats, his gaudy vest and knobbed cane. The young girls titter at his gallant essays, the professionals overcharge him, his cronies mark him down for a liar no matter what exploits of his youth he calls to memory. His diet is watched and remarked upon, and any out-of-the-way food he happens to care for is leeringly marked up as an attempt at rejuvenation. When that hour comes a man expects sympathy and even kindness from women. If he has lost it, he has lost it for them.

Source: Lockridge, Norman. The Sexual Conduct of Men and Women. New York: Bridgehead Books,1956.
~ pp. 238-39 ~