Q Dear Miss Abigail:
My parents are coming to visit soon. Problem is, they drive me batty with their subtle nagging and criticism of how I run my house. I don’t know if I can survive Christmas. Why don’t they let me grow up?
A Dear Weary:
You would think that the joy of the holidays would stifle criticism, but in fact it seems to bring out the worst in everyone. Never fear, you are not alone. A message to your parents (and parents everywhere): give a very special gift to your adult child this year – a break! This one brought to you by W. Clark Ellzey (I found it in his How to Keep Romance In Your Marriage from 1954).
All of us who have parents or who are parents should realize that parenthood is a function which should have an end. If the purpose of parenthood has not been completed it cannot end. . . . It is not easy for parents to stop being parents. They have been doing it for a long time by the time their child reaches adulthood, and it is difficult to bring parenthood to an end. Habits of thinking and feeling are well established and may have to be broken, or may be too strong to break. They should have been modified constantly throughout the years of childhood and youth of their children. Even that is not possible without some struggle and pain.
Source: Ellzey, W. Clark. How to Keep Romance in Your Marriage. New York: Association Press, 1954.
~ p. 65 ~